Lately, I’ve been really exploring my reading genres and taking a chance on authors that talk about different issues. One of these authors is Miss Chimamanda Adichie herself. In one of my previous posts, Girl Power, I talk a bit about my newfound love for Chimamanda’s work and even included her TED talk “We Should All be Feminist”. I was really intrigued by her views of feminism so I decided to read more about it. In “Dear Ijeawele” or “A Feminist Manifesto in Fifteen Suggestions” there was a lot of advice I thought would not only be beneficial to new mother’s but women, in general. There were suggestions I loved and some I couldn’t quite relate with.
So what were some lessons learned from “Dear Ijeawele”?
- That as a woman I should value what I love and never have to be the one to compromise that. Find something that you are passionate about!
- Never tell anyone they can’t do something on the basis that they are female. Men are not the only ones guilty of this. I remember reading an article that said that a majority of women-mostly white women- during the 2016 presidential election didn’t vote for Hilary Clinton because she is “a girl”. Whether it was outside male pressure or traditional narrow-mindedness, a lot of WOMEN didn’t think another woman could run the office.
- Disregard the notion that only women have to cook, clean and raise the kids, while the men just “help” out.
- Give your future child-or current- a sense of Identity. I am Nigerian-American. I am proud to be Nigerian and I am semi-proud to be American (the way this country is shifting these days I don’t even think I’m semi-proud anymore.)
- DO NOT TRY TO PLEASE ANYONE. I thought this was an important lesson because I have seen people including myself turn into someone they are not. There is no point in trying to fit into this mold of likability so that you can become more socially acceptable. At the end of the day, you are not going to look stupid… be honest with who you are and what you want to do!
Take her tips with a grain of salt…
Like I said earlier, I do value Miss Adichie’s view, but I don’t think feminism is some ladder you can climb up to. It’s ok to disagree with certain ideologies and actions and still be regarded as a feminist. For example, One of her tips was that as a woman it makes no sense to wait for a man to propose in marriage. That’s cool, that’s cool, but I would rather get my pinkie toe ran over before I ever propose to my future husband.
